My Heart Is My Husband’s, Not My Boyfriend’s.

“If my body wasn’t meant to be thrown around, guy to guy…then I’ve never been more sure that my heart wasn’t, either.”

In the past few weeks, I have learned a lot about my heart and what it was (and wasn’t) created for. I have learned that my heart was not created for break-ups, for separation or good-byes.

Our hearts were created soft and gentle, loving and giving and passionate things designed by the very hands of God.

God created our hearts for a steady, sure Love. For a Love that has no possibility of breaking. For a Love that is then and now and forever. For a Love that is faithful, devoted and sacred.

Our hearts were created for the kind of Love that God gives, for the kind of Love that God IS. And a Love that deeply resembles His Love, here, between two people.

Hear me in this: I have absolutely nothing against the way we date in this culture. I think it’s a rather exciting way to get to know someone, to experience new things, to learn about each other, about serving and loving unconditionally, communication and humility. (I could go on, but that would take this whole article.)

I think dating is great. Where I start to have something to say is where our hearts lay in those relationships.

My sister, God has shown me to have my heart set on my husband.

I’m not dating him right now; I don’t even know if I know him right now.

But, you better believe that I can honor him and love him right now.

Right now, as in this very moment.

Right now, as in this season that I’m in.

Right now, in this city, in this place, in this culture.

I want to cultivate a heart of love and honor for him, starting now.

So, that means that even if I am dating someone, even if I have an amazing boyfriend, that I understand that he is just that: my boyfriend.

Not my husband.

So that means that even if I am single, that I understand that my heart wasn’t meant to be thrown at any guy who looks my way.

It’s for my husband.

So, that means that I understand why I want to guard my heart, and why I do it intentionally, out of a place of willingness and not begrudgingly: because I love and honor my husband.

We so often think of saving ourselves for our husband solely meaning our bodies, but, at least for me, I want my husband to have my whole heart, too.

And I think that’s the way that God designed it.

If my body wasn’t meant to be thrown around, guy to guy…then I’ve never been more sure that my heart wasn’t, either.

I want to live in the way I was designed to live; I want my heart to know the fullest joy, the fullest love that God so intricately designed for us.

SO, here and now, I am looking to my husband, knowing that our marriage will be a glimpse of the deep love of Jesus for His Church.

Our sweet Jesus loves His bride; He sacrificed everything for Her before she knew Him.

And just as our sweet Jesus did for us, I want to love my husband before I know him. I want to save everything for him. I want him to know that before we were together, that I honored and valued and cherished him.  

My friend, I want to lay my life down for the Gospel and for the sacredness of marriage, for the sole purpose of showing the Gospel in the deepest and most intimate of relationships.

For the sake of my husband. For the sake of a world who is looking for True Love. For the sake of my sweet Jesus.

I want to honor my husband with all that I am.

Right now, in the midst of singleness or dating or relationships.

I hope your heart does, too.

So, my friends, let’s honor and understand how our hearts were designed. Let’s keep our eyes on our sweet Jesus. Let’s guard our hearts and hold sacred the beautiful design of marriage.

May we press on to know the deep, the committed, the sacrificial love that our sweet Jesus has for His beautiful Church.

And may we be intentional about saving ourselves for the sake of that Love, for the sake of my husband and I showing the world that Love.

With much, much love. And a heart dwelling in the love of my sweet Jesus. –Melissa

Melissa Applebee
Loved by Jesus. My Sweet Jesus Blogger. Cheerleading Coach. Barista. Life in community. Lover of dark chocolate. Prone to parking tickets. Admirer of tattoos. Every tribe. Every tongue. Excited for the Kingdom.

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